Helpful Advice from those who care |
Many of us have been in that position where we are about to take some step forward, whether in a creative venture, work, or even a new social situation, and that voice pops up telling us it's not going to happen. It reminds us of similar situations where it didn't work and it can leave us feeling doubtful we can achieve what we've set out to do. It can also represent the voice of others who step in with negative comments they believe are useful, helpful and appropriate.
I find that once these types of thoughts show up, they gain momentum (and to me, it feels like boarding a runaway train) and pretty soon they are taking over and robbing us of peace and clarity. It seems too challenging getting to positive thinking right away so here is what I do when this happens:
- Identify that you are riding the Negativity Train and that it's attempting to take over your way of thinking. In a way, it is doing what it knows to do to keep you safe from unknown territory, potential danger, and impending doom.
- Realize that you can change this by opening up to the idea of thinking in terms of possibilities.
- Change your self talk and use the technique psychologist Ethan Kross wrote about here , where you address yourself by your name, and use "you," rather than "I." Example: Alberto, you are on the Negativity Train to no where. All the passengers are bummed, yet ready to give you all kinds of "helpful" advice. You can decide at any time, to open up to new possibilities..what can you do now, to feel better?
- Remember that you can manage your self talk effectively
- Ask yourself questions in a new way.
With a more peaceful mindset, comes clarity, followed by intuitive insight, new ideas and feeling better.
For today, consider the way you talk to yourself and be open to the possibility that you can let go of some of the need to allow negative thinking to get in your way.
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